tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4783297469684640623.post7630242775505716430..comments2023-09-01T16:49:01.839+05:30Comments on WHIMS AND WISHES: Marriage, Misery or Mockery!Sharmistha Guhahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11313702624756588109noreply@blogger.comBlogger23125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4783297469684640623.post-44514232530251898962009-05-18T19:39:00.000+05:302009-05-18T19:39:00.000+05:30Oh it surely does take a back seat. And in case yo...Oh it surely does take a back seat. And in case you try to do that, you would be termed rude, uncultured, over-ambitious, self-centered!!<br /><br />I've been termed all of the above, but I refuse to think of others when its me who is going to get slaughtered unless there is a good reason why I should let that happen!! For the greater good!!<br /><br />In this situation, I don't see a greater Samhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06394200137631383145noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4783297469684640623.post-79616469575282674582009-05-15T14:34:00.000+05:302009-05-15T14:34:00.000+05:30@SumitHuman psychology and its workings never ceas...<B>@Sumit</B>Human psychology and its workings never cease to fascinate and intrigue me...<br />Why a person does what , under what circumstances is tough to fathom for distant bystanders...<br /><br />and in our country, there are so many equations to be kept in balance....the society, family, parents, in-laws....gosh!! it's tough...to please everybody....in the process of pleasing all, pleasingSharmistha Guhahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11313702624756588109noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4783297469684640623.post-81325250280994580942009-05-15T05:06:00.000+05:302009-05-15T05:06:00.000+05:30This is indeed sad!! Honestly, if I could I would ...This is indeed sad!! Honestly, if I could I would have talked P out of this and talk sense into those who need it. It seems a recipe for disaster. The parents have in their efforts to "set things right" for their son done the opposite. The lady, is a mystery!! It's absolutely tough to understand why she agreed to the match. But then, as you said its been 10 years, couldn't P have learned to mask Samhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06394200137631383145noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4783297469684640623.post-21689531652041816212009-05-14T21:57:00.000+05:302009-05-14T21:57:00.000+05:30@HR-Arre...na na!
Why should my sentiments be hur...@HR-Arre...na na! <br />Why should my sentiments be hurt in a normal debate!!!<br /><br />And what I wrote was my perception and thoughts about a certain social issue...we all are welcome to our perceptions and points of view. So I just countered your viewpoint (which conflicted with mine), with absolutely no thought on trying to convince...I cant convince, rather am not authorised to convince Sharmistha Guhahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11313702624756588109noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4783297469684640623.post-36068183534482475902009-05-14T15:58:00.000+05:302009-05-14T15:58:00.000+05:30At the outset ,I apologize if I had hurt your sent...At the outset ,I apologize if I had hurt your sentiments by telling P was suffering from a disease. As like you, I am not remotely associated with medical profession, hence it is not ethical on my part to decide whether P is suffering from any disease or not. Frankly,I never tried to do that.I only raised a doubt and wished that if he could be cured.<br />Now, after going through your comments , HRnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4783297469684640623.post-47698047533292687652009-05-13T11:44:00.000+05:302009-05-13T11:44:00.000+05:30@HR-I think there are certain points where I do no...<B>@HR-</B>I think there are certain points where I do not agree with you..<br />Though not remotely associated with the medical profession, I DO NOT think P is suffering from any Disease.<br />He is as normal as you or me...only his sexual orientation/preference is different.<br />There are many many viewpoints as to the cause of homosexuality...genetic, psychological, environmental....none of Sharmistha Guhahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11313702624756588109noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4783297469684640623.post-56873520737327572092009-05-08T11:53:00.000+05:302009-05-08T11:53:00.000+05:30In my last post I meant to say unambiguously effem...In my last post I meant to say unambiguously effeminate and not ambiguously effeminate... sorry!!HRnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4783297469684640623.post-74653564762356925842009-05-08T11:41:00.000+05:302009-05-08T11:41:00.000+05:30The author has finally chosen to write on a topic...The author has finally chosen to write on a topic which is being widely deliberated nowadays- The glory of gay world. The ticklish matter which people will love to discuss with gusto.I feel the comment box will inundate with comments in no time.<br />Personally, I never came across such personality , hence unable to feel the traits of the character. I am not a student of medicine too but a HRnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4783297469684640623.post-51169706415261855352009-05-08T01:53:00.000+05:302009-05-08T01:53:00.000+05:30@SSQuo-Thanks for sharing your friends' experi...<B>@SSQuo-</B>Thanks for sharing your friends' experience.<br />It is indeed sad and unfortunate...how society imposes its norms. They are deprived of their RIGHT to choose/decide by none else but parents...who can become their greatest ally/support.<br />Kudos to your friends for having the guts to fight for their identity & preference and also to their parents for having the courage to Sharmistha Guhahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11313702624756588109noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4783297469684640623.post-77975222004320301402009-05-07T22:32:00.000+05:302009-05-07T22:32:00.000+05:30This is a wonderful but terribly terribly sad post...This is a wonderful but terribly terribly sad post. It goes against EVERYTHING I believe in and it makes me angry and sad. <br /><br />I have two very very close friends who have different preferences than I do, and I have been through many ups and downs with them. One moreso than the other. It's hard for them to deal with their own identity than to have the world and then the parents to SSQuohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10576564544754748034noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4783297469684640623.post-56165177386698206882009-05-07T14:37:00.000+05:302009-05-07T14:37:00.000+05:30This is the type of hyppocracy I hate, so many boy...This is the type of hyppocracy I hate, so many boys bow before the parents before marriage , but defy them after the marriage, so why not show the courage before marriage, atleast you will not be ruining another person's life.Renuhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18052079745061422542noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4783297469684640623.post-80740576409899722242009-05-07T04:54:00.000+05:302009-05-07T04:54:00.000+05:30a very valid question - but as long as sexual pref...a very valid question - but as long as sexual preferences will remain in the closet, we will continue to see eyewash marriages like this. And India is so slow when it comes to social change.Sucharita Sarkarhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07802171314546508539noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4783297469684640623.post-67949495303245676172009-05-06T13:30:00.000+05:302009-05-06T13:30:00.000+05:30@Inder - As long as the pair are OK with it , it's...@Inder - As long as the pair are OK with it , it's fine...but ARE they OK with it?<br />'Coz the decision was imposed on them....<br /><br />Thanks for stopping by..hoping to 'see' you again and oftenSharmistha Guhahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11313702624756588109noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4783297469684640623.post-5197515096786941652009-05-05T18:39:00.000+05:302009-05-05T18:39:00.000+05:30marriage of convenience...
as song as the pair is...marriage of convenience...<br /><br />as song as the pair is aware of what they are getting into and are prepared for it... i think it is fine.Inderhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10818943412434096121noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4783297469684640623.post-57486287042432290252009-05-05T14:16:00.000+05:302009-05-05T14:16:00.000+05:30@LGL-Marriage itself is such a complex relationshi...@LGL-Marriage itself is such a complex relationship. And in India it isnt just a union of a man & woman but of two families....so the complexities increase manifolid...an endless equations have to be dealt with!<br /><br />And in this case the guy is gay...he has buckled to parental pressures. But I wonder why the girl had to agree ...she isnt (from what i've heard) one of the 'Sharmistha Guhahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11313702624756588109noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4783297469684640623.post-47702992411236907162009-05-05T13:53:00.000+05:302009-05-05T13:53:00.000+05:30come and read :)come and read :)Amritorupa Kanjilal https://www.blogger.com/profile/05297857308903060458noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4783297469684640623.post-75459300364891925332009-05-05T11:55:00.000+05:302009-05-05T11:55:00.000+05:30sharmistha... if i comment on this i'll end up wri...sharmistha... if i comment on this i'll end up writing another post :)<br /><br />the concept of arranged marriage itself is so fake, don't u think? like cattle breeding..<br />and in this case, the guy was gay (albeit closet gay). imagine how miserable a life his bride will live ...<br />marriages are so messy.Amritorupa Kanjilal https://www.blogger.com/profile/05297857308903060458noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4783297469684640623.post-66053681184481082032009-05-05T11:41:00.000+05:302009-05-05T11:41:00.000+05:30@Rajesh Maybe to a certain extent.... but in cases...<B>@Rajesh</B> Maybe to a certain extent.... but in cases such as these, it's a compromise of the highest order....it's death knell is sounded even before the relationship has begunSharmistha Guhahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11313702624756588109noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4783297469684640623.post-822537126855979782009-05-05T11:37:00.000+05:302009-05-05T11:37:00.000+05:30PB, Kavi, RMC : Isnt it strange and sad that paren...<B>PB, Kavi, RMC </B>: Isnt it strange and sad that parents, who can, if they want, be the greatest mental support to their offsrpings, are the one's inflicting so much mental trauma.<br /><br />And regarding the girl not knowing....highly impossible if I remember P rightly...and she's an intelligent, educated & well-informed woman. <br /><br />I was really not sure whether I should Sharmistha Guhahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11313702624756588109noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4783297469684640623.post-54918576901848688012009-05-04T23:50:00.000+05:302009-05-04T23:50:00.000+05:30very good post! Thanks for bringing out this aspec...very good post! Thanks for bringing out this aspect. I have no idea why parents can be so cruel under the camouflage of being caring!Roshnihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01107573625336456428noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4783297469684640623.post-36412408885493978282009-05-04T23:41:00.000+05:302009-05-04T23:41:00.000+05:30The story of P makes you think if this is an excep...The story of P makes you think if this is an exception or the norm. To me this seems to be an exception.<br /><br />For, i know of many classmates / acquiantances who have walked out of marriage / marriage arrangements because certain things didnt go too well. <br /><br />But yes, you are right. Parental and societal pressures do play a part. A big part !Kavihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11426040093753611098noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4783297469684640623.post-20783996331325029122009-05-04T16:48:00.000+05:302009-05-04T16:48:00.000+05:30In today's world, Marriages are no longer what it ...In today's world, Marriages are no longer what it has been earlier. Now every move is as per the convenience and gain.Rajeshhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10325697671806865458noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4783297469684640623.post-86704439466286206952009-05-04T15:43:00.000+05:302009-05-04T15:43:00.000+05:30Sharmistha
i was waiting a post from you. I think ...Sharmistha<br />i was waiting a post from you. I think at one stage even if you do not want you are forced to give your consent because otherwise you are taken as an abnormal member of society or your hidden mental background gets exposed. So we most of whom are hypocrits (because few has the strength of the mind to become so) finally agree to this system of society. But are you sure the girl pradipwritenowhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06321320863952722189noreply@blogger.com